A Bleeding Heart

Senses heightened as my chest tightens and I struggle to grasp what went wrong. Same sadness exacerbated by years of familiarity. Why do I allow you to rip my heart from my chest over and over and over again? Why do I trust you, believe you, listen to you, follow you; allowing my movements and thoughts to be persuaded by you?

The sound of you rings sweetly in my ears. Why would I think you are preparing to consume me with your fire? How would I know your steps are masterfully calculated to devour me?

I hear the alarms sounding wildly in the echoes of the wind; still I allow you inside my deep stirring energy? You feed me blue skies and beautiful rays of sun so why would I consider you as the darkness that withdraws the moon from my midnight?

Optimistically I search for you with the smile of ten thousand children feeding at the bosom of a gentle, warm, and nurturing mother. Why would I consider your hand as one that would choke life from me?

You skillfully allure me with your charm and grace. Your strength weakens me, but no, I had not considered you a venomous poison. Why would I see a sly fox when behind your eyes is the source of life?

You entice me with your persistent pursuit of my attention. Curiously I pause to explore your chase. Your enchanting sway delights me to deliver the fabric of my being to your feet and await instructions. Passionately I pursue you, but why would I anticipate your withdrawal? Why would I think you would leave me alone, hungering after you?  

As blissfully as love enters, it retreats leaving me with a bleeding heart. The same one that builds and breathes life is the same destroyer that steals the innocence of my love leaving me with a bleeding heart. Though I build my resistance to love, the gift giver constantly and creatively encourages me to invite love in beyond my bleeding heart.

So shall it be.

Baggage & Boundaries (Part 1)

What I've learned regarding relationship is most people want partnership without commitment. However, relationship requires an investment that is more than finances, more than an emotional commitment - it's a true connection, it's spiritual. Relationship requires communication, honesty, respect and so much more. Relationships require a fortified foundation. However, far too many of us carry around baggage from relationship to relationship often stemming from a void at some point in our childhood experiences. Before engaging in relationship/partnership, one must Know thyself!
 

Marcell "The Voice" Russell's, album, "The Serenade & The Sermon" coming 2013, speaks to pure love and authentic relationship beginning with self. After an interview with Marcell regarding his album and relationship, here is what he had to say:

Honestly, in the beginning the scriptures inspired most of my music as well as wanting to address issues in my own walk with God. Then other peoples stories were a bit infused. Next were the ups & downs from a past relationship that had me question so much about my faith. Finally, Vanessa, my amazing wife inspired the last stage of writing and producing this album.

When asked to explain the components of a successful relationship Marcell stated the following:

Dating today means testing someone out sexually, emotional, etc… looking for all the guarantees before you commit. That’s a horrible way to “date” especially when sex is involved. I’m not a fan of dating without a purpose of marriage. In fact it’s no where in the bible that anyone dated, they courted only.

I think should you do two things: 

1. Work everyday to become what you would desire from someone else; it can help keep you reasonable, grounded, humble and clear in your desires 

2. Search the scriptures and grab four scriptures that define your philosophy around love, friendship and marriage. Why? So often I meet religious men and women that can’t give me or anyone one scripture that guides the way they love or befriend people. We can just often rely on our upbringing and think we learned love from the perspective of the one who created love, friendship and marriage in the first place.

Unsure of why people stay in confining, restrictive, abusive, non-beneficial relationships, Marcell says:

To be honest I cannot speak for everyone but from my minimal experience it seems we want what is most familiar more then what is best. It can take years for a person to go from being an employee to a boss or from a boss to an actual entrepreneur because we often do what was taught to us and what we are familiar with. 

It’s the same things in relationships if I was never allowed to share my true emotions in my family, if I saw very little apologizing, if I was defensive even if I was wrong, if I saw a lot of manipulation growing then I’m familiar with that. 

But, if I heard grown ups being humble, being honest about the need for affection, talking through hurts and pains, and openly expressing desires then I am familiar with that. 

It can take folks years to break out of what is familiar verses what is best, genuine and healthy.

When asked to describe what knows about himself that makes him better at being a husband he expresses the following:

Well, I think what gives me a shot at being better is I know how much I need the bible to even remotely love my wife the way I’m called to. My wife only benefits from my walk with God. Love is defined in the word so I would be a crazy man to “love” my own way when love is a God product. I have to pray a lot and read the bible, otherwise I have too many examples of conflicting views on how to love my wife…Disney movies, my parents, TV, friends, radio, r&b music, hip-hop. I work hard to stick with the one who created marriage in the first place.

Marcell shares this advice for people having a problem with boundaries in relationships:

Oh wow, discussing boundaries is very hard for me, very hard. 

I learned true love IS boundaries. Thank God I’m married because I would never date any woman with no boundaries. 

Men and women with no boundaries leave all their desires, happiness, direction etc… on someone elses shoulders and get angry when the other person hasn’t “guessed” their needs and desires correctly. People with no boundaries are reckless and abusive...that's just my perspective. 

I say all the time “expectations that are not agreed upon by the opposite party is the beginning of an abusive relationship”. If you like a woman to call you right after work but you never say it but it creates an issues in your heart at some point … that is abusive you didn’t even give her a chance to meet the need or reject it. If you like for a man to buy you flowers but you never shared that in hopes he would ask or guess without you saying “I love flowers as a gift” but you tell your girlfriends “He still hasn’t bought me flowers, you know how I feel about that” that is abusive, you never gave him the chance to accept or reject your desires. 

Now after you share the things you desire and things you don’t feel comfortable with and they still blow it off well, they are telling you what you have in my opinion. Boundaries are huge to me.

Marcell's new video "Baggage" as well as the entire album "The Serenade & The Sermon" conveys his deepest thoughts regarding baggage, boundaries and the blessings of love. 

Marcell "The Voice" Russell, thank you for your contributions to the music industry, to relationships, love, self-awareness and especially God! 

Click to learn more  Marcell Russell

The Facade: At Odds With God

POEM

This is not a facade,

Yes, I truly love my God,

But my skin,

This flesh filled with sin,

Is always at odds with my God

No, it is not God's desire

That my soul should perish in the lake of fire,

He sent His son Jesus Christ the Messiah,

So that we could come to know Him - Go higher,

Rising above our sinful nature

But even with mercy and grace

I still find myself bound by guilt and shame,

What a contradiction, such a disgrace,

Especially since I have an agonizing distaste,

A distaste for the enemy of my soul,

And certainly because God says so,

I'm worth more than diamonds, rubies and gold

Why then do I feel the need to sell my soul,

Bleeding continuously as the truth unfolds,

The enemy believes in casting doubt,

Doubt beginning with my own fears,

He feeds on my anxiety

This is the facade that over shadows our society

My sobriety begins where my love ends,

And my growing hate paves way for revenge

But with whom do I fight

Does the enemy have me bound and at odds

Or is it the distortion of truth fueling my own hidden agenda against my God

Now THAT my love, is the true revealing of a life long facade

"We do not wrestle against flesh and blood, 

but against the rulers, against the authorities, 

against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, 

against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places" 

~ Ephesians 6:12

All to often, many of us feel trapped, confused, frustrated, lost or as if we are fighting against ourselves but I want to remind you that you are God's best! Facades are the working of the enemy to cloud your mind and your vision of self.  We all question our existence, our purpose, our failures and we even feel like we are at odds with God. It's okay to question -- introspection is good for your growth. So take time to look in the mirror of life as well as your own reflection, take the mask off and get real with where you are. If you are hurting, acknowledge it...whatever you feel, recognize it and remember: what's healthy is seeing, hearing, feeling and dealing but what derails is running, hiding, ignoring and down playing. I love you but God loves you best!

PRAYER:

Jehovah Jireh, supplier of every need, step into my heart. Expose dark places within me. Enter into my fears and cast them out. Make my failures useful for Your purpose. Cleanse even my reflection so that when I look at myself, I see the evidence of You in all Your splendor. Open my hears to Your soft whispers. Help me to stand with You and not be defensively at odds with You. I want to know You in the beauty of Holiness. Receive me into the shadows of Your wings and cast shadows of doubt and sins residue into the sea of forget fullness. In the precious name of Christ the Messiah I pray with faith, Amen

Building Again

"BUILDING AGAIN"

Posted from Wednesday Morning Worship & Word dated 4/3/2013

Most of us are used to an exegesis of the biblical text or rather a critical explanation or interpretation but today I shall not do that.  I am simply going to use the text, comparing it to us and life - providing real life, tangible and relevant word that will leave each of us pondering this thing - this word entitled "Building Again".

It is my prayer that this word is food for your mind, body, spirit and soul.  I pray that it nourishes you.  I pray that it improves you and for some it may release you into a new place.  It may clarify somethings, taking away distortions, faulty thinking or misunderstandings.  I pray you open and avail yourself to a new era, a new way, a new fire, a new breath, a new life and certainly, a new foundation.

"The greatest good you can do for an other is not 

just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own"

~ Benjamin Disraeli

SCRIPTURE REFERENCE:    EZRA 3:11-12 NIV

"With praise and thanksgiving they sang to the Lord: “He is good; his love toward Israel endures forever.” And all the people gave a great shout of praise to the Lord, because the foundation of the house of the Lord was laid. But many of the older priests and Levites and family heads, who had seen the former temple, wept aloud when they saw the foundation of this temple being laid, while many others shouted for joy.

Do you understand the nature and importance of foundation?

Definition of foundation: (noun)

• the basis or ground work of anything 
• the basis for something physical or mental
• the natural or prepared ground or base on which some structure rests
• the lowest division of a building, wall, or the like
  (Partly or wholly below the surface of the ground)
• the act of founding, setting up, establishing

The foundation is also known as the root, reason, ground work, base, infrastructure, nuts and bolts and/or support

You know, when something like a building has been built on faulty grounds, it may not topple quickly/immediately but it is certain to cave in/give way and/or crumble at some point.  Even if the foundation is strong, over time it may grow weak.  Today, I would like for each of us to consider ourselves buildings and also builders.  

However, the only way we will successfully master building another building is to check the foundation that we stand on.  And if we see damage in the foundation, if there are cracks in the infrastructure we must decide whether the damages are mendable or be wise enough, intelligent enough and even courageous enough to bring in the wrecking crew.  

Allow them to totally tear us down and then allow ourselves to trust the Master builder to align our foundation, to fortify our core, to smooth rough surfaces, to totally redesign us, building a more solid and aesthetically resolute building.

This  is our job as Kingdom dwellers:  to build and be built - to be rebuilt and to rebuild.  This is what we do with the church - more specifically, the body of Christ.  We build those who are weary, those who are broken, those who are lost, those who go astray, those seeking redemption and restoration, those falling apart, those crumbling, those with cracks, those burnt out and yes, even us.

Rejoice in the initial formatting and planning of your building! Rejoice in the manufacturing and construction of your building! And yes, even rejoice in the collapse of your building, knowing God himself is the Master builder, always ready to repair and rebuild. No matter what state you are in, God is more than capable of restoring you to a state better than you were previously. Be open to the continuous process of building. Certify and approve the Master Builders presence by simply saying, "God Almighty, the one who alone is the solid rock, it is well. I receive you now and always. Build me AGAIN"

Death Bed

Death Bed

By Titus Broom

 

There once was a man that lay breathing heavily on his deathbed.  Friends and family had already been by to say their finale goodbyes, so the man requested to spend his final minutes alone in prayer. The family and friends respecting his request stepped out into the hall closing the door behind them.

 

The man began to grasp the rails of the bed as he pulled himself up and bowed his head. He spoke saying, “Lord I thank you for the life you have given me and all that you allowed me to do.”

 

Just then he heard a voice say yeah right, opening up his eyes the man saw, people he didn't recognize surrounding his bed. He asked, “Am I dead?” One of the individuals standing around said no, not yet. We just thought before you did die you needed to be confronted by all that will be dying with you.

 

The man looked at the faces around the bed in desperation saying I don't understand. One of the individuals standing at the foot of the bed said, “We represent all the wasted time, the words you did not say when you were supposed to, the books you did not write, the love you did not give, the dreams you did not fulfill, the ideas that never got off paper, the forgiveness you would not extend and the promises not kept.”

 

The man said but I did this and I did not have time to do that, and she wouldn't forgive me so I did not forgive her. Silence, one of the individuals yelled, while pointing a finger into the man’s face, we don't want to die, we want to live, yet we are doomed to be added to the library of endless potential found in cemetery's around the world. The faces of the individuals (potential) showed great anger and then suddenly they disappeared.

 

The man’s prayer changed from Lord thank you for this and thank you for that, into Lord, I'm so sorry for not using the life you gave me the way you wanted. Then the man and all his potential died.

 

Question who or what will be around your deathbed? What we do with our lives today, until that day, will determine who is there.  Trust me I know – I've been there twice.

 

Written by Titus Broom Inspired By a comment he heard Les Brown make. ©2009

 

 

Titus Broom lives in Charlotte, NC and is a Motivational Speaker, Writer and Poet

 

Connect with him via:

inspire1titus@facebook.com  

https://twitter.com/TitusBroom

www.linkedin.com/pub/titus-broom/21/985/74

 

 

Wednesday Morning Worship & Word

Greetings!

Welcome to a new beginning with Wednesday Morning Worship & Word

Charged to change and grow spiritually, a group of nine women came together for daily prayer commencing January 2011. After more than eighteen months of early morning prayer men from all over the country joined this group of praying women which grew from eight locals from Maryland to more than a hundred women from all over the country.  

December 5, 2012 concluded a two year prayer call that took place 7 days a week with participants from all over the USA such as; MD, DC, VA, NC, SC, GA, NJ, NY, OR, WA, FL, AZ, LA, OK, CA, DE, WI as well as many other places. People even called in from Canada and Japan. These times of praying together, fellowship, worship, studying the word and reflecting on that word led to physical, emotional, mental healing, growth to the body of Christ as well as spiritual growth and increased faith.

 

God is not done and neither are we.  Feel free to join us weekly via conference call, every Wednesday morning for Worship & Word.

 

EVERY WEDNESDAY

TIME: 6AM EST

DIAL: 605.562.3000

CODE: 223212#

 

Email prayer request to: stacie.jwhitaker@gmail.com

Feel free to invite others to join the call

***This is an international call -- Eastern Standard Time

Crushed

Happy Sunday! May the peace of God flow to you today and always!

For the last five months I have been very quiet.  No blogs have been written. Books that were supposed to be on shelves were halted.  No projects progressed. Everything in my life was quiet.  This quiet space was not my typical "taking a moment to reflect" or "fasting, consecrating and praying". This was a forced quiet.

About eight months ago my world began to fall apart. I believe I was doing all that God wanted me to do. I was fasting, praying, studying, loving people from a pure place, being open and honest (in other words transparent), facilitating a 7 day a week morning prayer call with people from across the US, applying the word to my daily living, helping those without room and board secure a place to rest their heads - I was not only feeding people physically but I allowed God to use me as a vessel to feed and nourish the souls, minds and spirits of those wounded, weary, lost, broken, discouraged and so forth. 

No matter what I did or did not do, the time came when I felt crushed by my circumstances and forgotten by my God.  There was an unsettling deep within; a force that came and a weight that fell in my home, on my children, my finances, my relationship, my mind, my body and my spirit.  I was extremely restless. Devoid of focus, insomnia settled in. Peace searched for me as I longed for it, but peace I could not find. 

I felt like a hypocrite – one who knew the word and shared that word but seemingly placed that same fruitful word on a shelf as if it did not apply to me at that moment.  I tried holding fast to what I knew but I could not. 

This time was like none I have ever experienced. Seems the only way I can truly describe these last eight months is to say that it was like a combination of my past life experiences coming together, happening at once.  Having my mother, father and step-dad die at the same time, while I sat nursing my son who was gravely ill as an infant, caring for my daughter who was recovering from heart surgery, going through divorce while pregnant and so ill that doctors had no faith of whether I would make it through pregnancy, let alone make it to see another day...I was on my death bed -- One can only imagine the stress and fear to have this combination of things happening all at once.

Now I do not want to mislead - these things did not happen all at once but the last eight months has been LIKE having all these events that have happened in my life, happen all at once.

With severe depression taking over, my eating and sleeping regiments were off.  Electric waves began shooting through my head.  The pressure made my eyes feel like they were being squeezed out of my head.  Back aches, neck aches and constant headaches consumed me.  Then I began going through an extreme hormonal imbalance causing other issues that left me drained.

I had to do something my pride despises; I actually had to ask for help. I had to allow myself this time to be vulnerable, to trust other people, to let down my guard so that I could be treated, taken care of and healed.  What I learned AGAIN, and even more so, learned to apply is that I am not an island unto myself.

Over the last eight months I have prayed, cried, screamed, slept, wallowed, hurt deep, lost something’s and some people, acquired new friends and relationships, my family developed an even stronger bond and I have learned that I am not the savior but a human who has chosen to be a vessel by which God can operate and function through to impact other people’s lives.  I am not 100% but I woke up the last few days with my mind so fixed on God that I asked Him again, “Lord, what would you have me to do?”  The answer was nothing new, nothing super spiritual or strange.  It was a simple, “nothing” and you know what, I am okay with doing nothing right now. 

If I could encourage anyone feeling the pressures of life right now, if I could offer a word of advice it would be this: Just BE! Be love, be light, be joy-filled, be at peace, be kind, be gentle…simply BE!!!  Life will continue to have its challenges, trials, test, struggles and pains but we need to make up our minds that everything happening to us and around us is doing what it is supposed to.  So be content. Embrace every moment!

That is precisely what I have been doing – learning more and more to Embrace me…the good, the bad, the ups, the downs, the happy times and sad times, the people who come and the people who go.  All of these events and experiences that have happened over the last few months – forcing me to be quiet and listen to not only God’s authentic voice but the voice that lives deep inside of me has taught me to not take myself so seriously.  Enjoy every moment and continue on this journey of Embracing Me.

None of us are perfect and everyday in simply BEING we are BECOMING – so just BE – be grateful, be open, be responsive to that inner voice, be responsive to your bodies craving for peace, love, joy, happiness and especially the quiet moments. 

Oh, and by the way, God was never absent during this quiet time.  He was the constant when everything else was in disarray.  He was the soothing song in my spirit when I could not sing and did not want to talk.  He was the gentle warmth that wrapped me on lonely nights.  It was God who sent my living Angels to take me to doctors appointments, to pay bills for me, to cook food for me, to sit with me and cry with me, to speak a bold word of strength and encouragement, to drop by unannounced and force me to take a ride with them – God was there.  He was and still is my place of refuge, my rock, my safe place – As I did nothing but rest in Him, God nursed me and continues to fortify me. 

When you feel crushed, just let God hold you!

“We have troubles all around us, but we are not defeated. WE do not know what to do, but we do not give up the hope of living.  We are persecuted, but God does not leave us.  We are hurt sometimes, but we are not destroyed.” ~ 2 Corinthians 4:8-11 NCV

 

PRAYER:

Maker of the heavens and earth, today help me to embrace every moment with gladness, contentment and a deep sense of peace knowing you are here with me. Amen

Eyes dripping with tears...

My tears fall profusely this morning but its not what you think.  My heart is in tack! My mind is in tack! My body is in tack! My relationships are in tack! My household is in tack! My children are in tack!

Well, why then do my eyes drip with tears this morning? Simply because I rose to see another day and was reminded that God loves me! My delight is in the Lord this morning. 

I consider the fact that twenty years ago the doctors gave me a grim report saying they had done all they can but I trusted in a God who is not like man.  I believed the report of the Lord over, above and beyond what men could speak and do.  I trusted God enough to release (surrender) my body to Him.  I believed God enough to rest (trust) in Him.  I even did so expecting God for relief (provision) to do what only He could do.  So as I reflect this morning I can say with my whole heart that God has been better to me than I've been to myself and its NOT a cliche for me.  I can say the Lord loves me, covers me, keeps me, protects me, shields me,  prunes me, corrects me, lifts me and even leaves room for me to turn my heart towards Him when everything at times faints within me.  The Lord is my rock and so this morning I am crying because I am grateful, grateful not only for what God has done but simply because who He is and He is the word of life. God is LOVE, absolute love!

PRAYER:

God, Lord of all, Giver of life, thank you for loving me.  Thank you for keeping my mind, body, spirit and considering my soul.  Lord thank you for breathing on me today.  Thank you O' Lord for reshaping my thoughts so I can see me as you see me.  Lord thank you for looking beyond my faults.  Thank you for breaking my flesh and even my spirit so that you can get out of me what you desire.  Lord you are the Father of all and I am simply grateful for you just being you.  Now Lord for the eye who reads, for the ones who are not in a place to understand how deep your love runs, for those who are not able to see that they are wonderfully and beautifully made, Lord I pray that you will send Angels to encamp around them.  Release them from self destruction.  Speak into their spirits.  Change their minds and renew them daily.  Let not their hearts be troubled but bring them to a place of peace.  Thank you for hearing these petitions and cries, In Jesus Name I do pray, Amen

SCRIPTURE: "Trust in Him at all times; pour out your heart to Him, for God is our refuge" ~ Psalm 62:8

LIFEBOOK 2012

LIFEBOOK 2012 ~ Shared by Brother LaMarr D. Shields, President of Urban Leadership Institute

Health
1. Drink plenty of water
2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar
3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants, and eat less food that is manufactured in plants
4. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy
5. Make time for prayer
6. Play more games
7. Read more books than you did in 2011
8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day
9. Sleep for 7 hours
10. Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day ---- and while you walk, smile

Personality: 11. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
12. Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
13. Don't over do ; keep your limits
14. Don't take yourself so seriously ; no one else does
15. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip
16. Dream more while you are awake
17. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
18. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.. Don't hate others.
20. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present
21. No one is in charge of your happiness except you
22. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
23. Smile and laugh more
24. You don't have to win every argument.. Agree to disagree.

Community: 25. Call your family often
26. Each day give something good to others
27. Forgive everyone for everything
28. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6
29. Try to make at least three people smile each day
30. What other people think of you is none of your business
31. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your family and friends will. Stay in touch.

Life: 32. Do the right things
33. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful
34. GOD heals everything
35. However good or bad a situation is, it will change
36. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up
37. The best is yet to come
38. When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it
39. Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy!

"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase"

~ Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Hell & Heaven at 8 (New Reviews)

Hell & Heaven at 8

By: Stacie J. Whitaker-Harris

Purchase your book today for $14.95 by clicking the link below

Review testimonials of women and men whose lives changed after reading "Hell & Heaven at 8".

TESTIMONIAL 1:

You spoke to me and my colleagues at  CCBC Essex about your book "Hell & Heaven at 8" & embracing ourselves. I didn't read the book right away but when I did, I read it cover to cover in less than 3hrs. It was that captivating. To think that someone so young could endure so much made me think about my own life and past experiences. From drug addictions to foster home involvement, I too could relate. Reading your story made me realize that many people relate, they just hold it in or brush it off. But they don't realize that apart of embracing yourself is embracing the bad as well as the good.

I read this thinking "Wow, I just want to meet this little girl and let her know that everything will be alright." But, I met her. And it was her who told me everything will be alright. It was her who loves herself more than anything, despite her past. And I'm grateful for such a good read and for being able to meet such a good person. I can't wait for the next installment to this series and I'm recommending it to all my friends and family. I've been inspired so I know they will be too.

Thanks again for your time and the courage to share your story.

Sincerely

Inspired of Essex, Maryland

TESTIMONIAL 2:

Hell & Heaven at 8 really helped me take a closer look at resolving my own hurts and pains. I had to look at my failed marriage again but through a different lens. Thank you

Queen of Greensboro, North Carolina

 TESTIMONIAL 3:

Bravo, Stacie. You have gone to great lengths to revealingly and documenting the abuse and suffering of your childhood. You have done a great job writing of the difficulties which have shaped your life. I applaud you for being so candid. This has happened in too many homes throughout the U.S. I think you represent the forthright and dedicated leadership that Dr. King felt was needed to lead coming generations. I thank you for sharing your experiences in early life and applaud your discovery of God who is there to guide you.

Thank you,

Harriet Stulman, Board Member of INNterim Housing Corporation

 TESTIMONIAL 4:

Hell & Heaven at 8 is a wonderfully intriguing story.  I love how the father's wrote letters.  They acted as a way to make amends demonstrating the love of the father. Its amazing how you went through what you did with your family but hold no resentment, using your past experiences to inspire others.  The book also says its okay to tell the truth about yourself because the truth sets you free.

Mr. Hargrove of Middle River, Maryland 

TESTIMONIAL 5:

Ms. Stacie, thank you for sharing your story.  It really let me see that no matter what comes our way we can persevere.  I have always felt alone like no one understood me because I was quiet.  Well its because I have been in foster care. I have been treated bad, even abused which isn't easy to admit.  I now feel ready to share my story to help other foster care kids. Thanks again.

Scott of Owings Mills, Maryland

TESTIMONIAL 6:

Dear Ms. Harris, it was a pleasure meeting you face to face. Your story really touched my heart. Reading it now helps me understand your passion and commitment to helping others. I thank God for you! Keep doing what you are doing knowing, with God all things are possible.

Mrs. Henson of Baltimore, Maryland

TESTIMONIAL 7:

Amazing how the entire "Hell & Heaven at 8" story has a lot of teaching in the book. It took me back to my childhood and other areas in my life. It's awesome, especially the piece about trust. Anybody young, old, man or woman can take something from it. For men as long as they can get pass their thoughts of possible bashing they will get it - they'll get the lessons.  I am not an avid reader but I read it in one sitting. Some of the stories I had to read over and over especially the introduction.  It was the concept of the apologies.  We really do have to understand the weight of our words. 

Torment makes us go crazy outside ourselves, especially men like me who try to keep the dirt hidden. Accountability is the great equalizer. Embracing me is perfect because as the story unfolds and breaks down into different pieces it helped me to embrace me. I could totally relate.  It helped me put somethings back in place within myself.  All in all, wonderful book!

Chris of Columbia, Maryland

TESTIMONIAL 8:

God kept you with purpose.  The healing of a nation is at hand ~ from the inside out!

Dr. Greene of Pikesville, Maryland

TESTIMONIAL 9:

Reading Hell and Heaven at 8 ... Opened my eyes to see how blessed I was growing up. I had a two parent home and they showed that they loved me. I was born blessed and I'm  walking in blessings daily.

Linda Mayo of Parkville, Maryland

"Embracing Me" Series Launches With "Hell & Heaven at 8"

"In order to know who you really are, In order to know the power which you possess, In order to grow, In order to live and be free, You must first be willing to embrace every moment…The days before your existence, The days when you came to be and the legacy that you will leave behind…Know thyself, Embrace who you are"  

~ Stacie J. Whitaker- Harris ~

(Baltimore, MD)— "Hell & Heaven at 8", one of four books in the Embracing Me series written by Stacie J. Whitaker-Harris, tells of her life’s journey from girlhood to womanhood while experiencing the disappointments of rape, molestation and other abuses that life serves. The story unfolds in eight-year increments, offering a glimpse into pivotal points in Harris’ life journey that have allowed her to heal, grow and embrace the woman she was created to be, using the way points as a platform for development.

According to Harris, this memoir is offered as a building block to encourage healing for women, men and families who have experienced life’s trauma and difficulties--"Unfortunately, my story is a common one, often held inside, leaving young women wounded for generations. Although the book discloses true accounts of my life, it is not to bash or tear down but rather to build". As a turn from the norm, Harris’ book intersperses letters of apology from various men of varying backgrounds and experiences who speak to Harris’ experiences along the book’s journey.

"Hell & Heaven at 8," not only shares Harris’ own poignant, painful, and victorious story, but the letters of apology dispersed throughout the series from men, serve to inspire, encourage, motivate, and direct other women to embrace healing themselves. According to Dr. Allen C. Barham Sr., "I’m confident that not only will Stacie’s personal memoir touch your heart, and prod your instincts, but you will also find one, or many, letters in the series that will strike a powerful chord within your spirit that will provoke your emotions to react. Don’t be afraid of reacting, and of acting; it’s the non-action that has kept you stuck".

Harris believes healing broken women leads to healing and restoration of broken boys, men and eventually, families and uses a combination of reflection and restoration as evident through the letters distributed throughout the text as a catalyst to promote this healing process.

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Thank you!!!

LOOK FOR BOOKS II - IV OF THE EMBRACING ME SERIES COMING AUGUST 2013

"16 Tears" 
"Death at 24"
"32 The Awakening"

Hidden in the Secret Place

Each morning I rise with a spirit of gratitude and my heart is filled with the expectation that God shall keep me safe from all harm.  Even when all around me appears to be out of sync and in no particular order, I trust God beyond what I can see.  I lay before the God of my salvation seeking His face, acknowledging Him in all His glory and splendor.  The atmosphere of confusion and chaos has to come in order because of the God I serve and I am NOT afraid, nor am I utterly weary having been beaten to the ground but instead, I cry out to my God knowing He will deliver me.  He will lift me up above every circumstance and ALL will know the power, strength and might of my God!

PSALM 27:
The Lord is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the strength of my life; Of whom shall I be afraid?
When the wicked came against me to eat up my flesh,
My enemies and foes, They stumbled and fell.
Though war may rise against me, In this I will be confident.
One thing I have desired of the Lord, That will I seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the Lord,
And to inquire in His temple.
For in the time of trouble He shall hide me in His pavilion;
In the secret place of His tabernacle He shall hide me;
He shall set me high upon a rock.
And now my head shall be lifted up above my enemies all around me;
Therefore I will offer sacrifices of joy in His tabernacle;
I will sing, yes, I will sing praises to the Lord.
Hear, O Lord, when I cry with my voice!
Have mercy also upon me, and answer me. 
When You said, “Seek My face,”
My heart said to You, “Your face, Lord, I will seek”
Do not hide Your face from me;
Do not turn Your servant away in anger;
You have been my help;
Do not leave me nor forsake me,
O God of my salvation.
When my father and my mother forsake me,
Then the Lord will take care of me.
Teach me Your way, O Lord,
And lead me in a smooth path, because of my enemies.
Do not deliver me to the will of my adversaries;
For false witnesses have risen against me,
And such as breathe out violence.
I would have lost heart, unless I had believed
that I would see the goodness of the Lord
In the land of the living.
Wait on the Lord;
Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the Lord!

PRAYER:
Creator of the Heavens and the earth, God of all, refiner of my soul, thank you for being my very present help in the time of trouble.  Thank you for allowing me to experience sheer joy, and peace in the presence of my enemies and my circumstances.  Thank you for shielding me from all harm.  Thank you for always standing strong when I am weak.  Thank you for building me and lifting me.  Thank you for your undying love. In Jesus Name, Amen



Hell & Heaven at 8 - Embracing Me Book I

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

"Embracing Me" Series Launches With
 "Hell & Heaven at 8"

"In order to know who you really are, In order to know the power which you possess, In order to grow, In order to live and be free, You must first be willing to embrace every moment…The days before your existence, The days when you came to be and the legacy that you will leave behind…Know thyself, Embrace who you are"    
~ Stacie J. Whitaker- Harris

(Baltimore, MD)— "Hell & Heaven at 8", one of four books in the Embracing Me series written by Stacie J. Whitaker-Harris, tells of her life’s journey from girlhood to womanhood while experiencing the disappointments of rape, molestation and other abuses that life serves. The story unfolds in eight-year increments, offering a glimpse into pivotal points in Harris’ life journey that have allowed her to heal, grow and embrace the woman she was created to be, using the waypoints as a platform for development.

According to Harris, this memoir is offered as a building block to encourage healing for women, men and families who have experienced life’s trauma and difficulties -- "Unfortunately, my story is a common one, often held inside, leaving young women wounded for generations. Although the book discloses true accounts of my life, it is not to bash or tear down but rather to build". As a turn from the norm, Harris’ book intersperses letters of apology from various men of varying backgrounds and experiences who speak to Harris’ experiences along the book’s journey.

"Hell & Heaven at 8," not only shares Harris’ own poignant, painful, and victorious story, but the letters of apology dispersed throughout the series from men, serve to inspire, encourage, motivate, and direct other women to embrace healing themselves. According to Dr. Allen C. Barham Sr., "I’m confident that not only will Stacie’s personal memoir touch your heart, and prod your instincts, but you will also find one, or many, letters in the series that will strike a powerful chord within your spirit that will provoke your emotions to react. Don’t be afraid of reacting, and of acting; it’s the non-action that has kept you stuck".

Harris believes healing broken women leads to healing and restoration of broken boys, men and eventually, families and uses a combination of reflection and restoration as evident through the letters distributed throughout the text as a catalyst to promote this healing process.

COMING JUNE 2015:

Embracing Me Memoir II: "16 Tears"

Embracing Me Memoir III: "Death At 24"

Embracing Me Memoir IV: "32 The Awakening"

Trusting the Authentic Voice of God

SCRIPTURE: But from there you will seek the Lord your God, and you will find Him if you seek Him with all your heart and with all your soul. When you are in distress and all these things come upon you in the latter days, when you turn to the Lord your God AND obey HIS Voice for the Lord your God is a merciful God. He will NOT forsake you nor destroy you, nor forget the covenant of your fathers which He swore to them

- Deuteronomy 4:29-31

With the first week of our new year behind us many of us have stepped up our faith. We've been studying more. We are worrying less. We have done things we would not otherwise do. We even trust ourselves more. This is a great start to a new year of promise but again we must remember that this is the year of faith and increase through works. We must remember that the old mustard seed faith won't sustain us in this new season. Ok, so these are great reminders for things we already know and have heard before so now what?

Let me encourage you to not only increase your faith so that every area of your life increases but also so that you learn to incline your ears to the very mouth of God in the midst of it all. In other words, not only trusting Gods voice but being certain and assured that it is most certainly Gods voice that you hear.

About four, almost five years ago I was living the life. Excited about my new home, my children, my education, my new heart filled with love and while I was sleep I heard "I have a husband for you". I woke up almost frantic and crazed. Although I KNEW the voice, I still looked and shook the person lying beside me with whom I'd been in a relationship with for almost three and a half years. I was irritated as if that person was the one speaking; I guess I needed to be angry with someone. See, not only had God spoke this husband thing but He expected me to resolve my relationship and start a new one with Him. I was in awe, to say the least. Why you might ask? The answer is or at least it was simple.  After all this time, I finally had someone who loved me, who listened to me and who respected me.  To top it off, we had recently bought a home together. I was angry because I couldn't believe God would allow me to enter into this agreement for the house when He knew He had a husband for me.

God told me to let Him love me and heal me. He told me not only to come out of this relationship but to spend one year loving Him, letting Him love, hold and heal me. My relationship dissolved in less than two months from the time God called me out.  It was not without hesitation, irritation, pain or second guessing that I trusted the voice of God but only with pieces of His promise. I did not release what He promised back into His care and control. In fact, I began to seek for myself, in other words I was testing Gods word "is this the husband, is this the husband, is this the husband". I questioned God, which is okay because it’s in questions that we acquire understanding but I questioned and did not trust! That's where the problem was -- in the lack of trust in God's word.

You know, even when God spoke to me in 2010 telling me to pray for a particular group of women, I was still disobedient, non-trusting and even selfish if I must be honest.  Last year when God called me again to a place of partnered prayer, which began with only one young woman and me, later expanding to over hundreds of women and eventually men joining us throughout the year, I still questioned Gods call for me to lead this prayer initiative.  My disobedience and inability to trust the one who created me sent me through unnecessary trauma.  In fact, I've been just like the children of Israel many times in my life due to lack of trust in Gods authentic voice thus I spent unnecessary time wandering in the desert in circles hoping to get to Gods promise but not listening to His voice for guidance.

A journey that should have been short lasted forty years. (Numbers 32:13 KJV - And the Lords anger was kindled against Israel, and he made them wander in the wilderness forty years, until all the generation, that had done evil in the sight of the Lord, was consumed).

And now, after all this time and especially over the last year I've learned to release...totally give God back the promise of a husband, I learned that if God leads the prayer than I don’t have to do anything but be the vessel.  I learned to rest -- not worry, not seek, but be patient while in His (the Masters) loving arms all while trusting Him for relief -- in other words provision---knowing God will do and is more than able to perform that which He promised. No more wandering in the desert for me! I've had enough drought, I've been thirsty for way to long, I've had my fill of manna and now desire what God desires for me to eat, I've seen enough dirt, I've had way to many scorching days and far too many cold nights so whatever it is that the Lord has spoken it is so (2 Corinthians 1:20 KJV - For all the promises of God in Him are yea, and in Him Amen, unto the glory of God by us).

What really started this new journey of faith and trust in the authentic voice of God was Gods continued instructions which included the prayer call. After many days and nights of crying about my unworthiness and my fear of being persecuted or called a hypocrite the Lord woke me from sleep with the word Zephaniah. I repeated Zephaniah! Lord what is that? Is that even a book in the bible? I grabbed it and surely there it was!

So let me share this with you a summary regarding the book of Zephaniah:

Zephaniah talks about how repentance goes deeper than outward behavior. Zephaniah practiced the law of intuition.  He intuitively knew that real change requires more than what the leader can legislate.  He sought more than external reformation – he wanted internal transformation.  The people didn’t need to turn over a new leaf; they needed a new life. So the prophet took a risk and acted.  He began to call the Hebrews to look at their hearts, their motives, their desires, and their private lives.  He meddled – touched a chord.  He spoke to issues that needed to be addressed, issues that most leaders fear to bring up.

After reading that summary I could clearly see what God was saying to me.  He said listen, I am calling you to a place of transparency, a place of compassion, a place where you think of your sisters and brothers more highly than you regard yourself, I am calling you to be accountable to share my word, I am calling you to obedience, I am calling you to a new place, I am calling you to be transformed.

See God does not need us to do things that we are used to doing just because it feels right or because we are afraid to do anything new but God wants to change our entire lives. He wants to replace our lives with the life He promised but how can He do it without us listening to His authentic voice?

You know you are listening to the authentic voice of God when:

1. You quiet all the other voices within to hear the Lord clearly and distinctively.

2. When your inhibitions about what you've heard begins to fade. In other words, when you are not afraid of the ridicule of man you will know its God’s authentic voice AND obey

3. When things around you don't change but your perspective of them does

4. When you recognize you are no longer wandering in darkness, dirt or things of the past

5. When you see His very word unfold before your eyes

Some trust in chariots, some in horses, some in men but I trust in the word of the Lord. Whose report will YOU believe? I don't bank on man I put all my stock in God, knowing in due season I reap those things which He promised if I faint not and do it by trusting the Authentic voice of God!

God bless!  LISTEN well and know that I am praying for you!