The Facade: At Odds With God

POEM

This is not a facade,

Yes, I truly love my God,

But my skin,

This flesh filled with sin,

Is always at odds with my God

No, it is not God's desire

That my soul should perish in the lake of fire,

He sent His son Jesus Christ the Messiah,

So that we could come to know Him - Go higher,

Rising above our sinful nature

But even with mercy and grace

I still find myself bound by guilt and shame,

What a contradiction, such a disgrace,

Especially since I have an agonizing distaste,

A distaste for the enemy of my soul,

And certainly because God says so,

I'm worth more than diamonds, rubies and gold

Why then do I feel the need to sell my soul,

Bleeding continuously as the truth unfolds,

The enemy believes in casting doubt,

Doubt beginning with my own fears,

He feeds on my anxiety

This is the facade that over shadows our society

My sobriety begins where my love ends,

And my growing hate paves way for revenge

But with whom do I fight

Does the enemy have me bound and at odds

Or is it the distortion of truth fueling my own hidden agenda against my God

Now THAT my love, is the true revealing of a life long facade

"We do not wrestle against flesh and blood, 

but against the rulers, against the authorities, 

against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, 

against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places" 

~ Ephesians 6:12

All to often, many of us feel trapped, confused, frustrated, lost or as if we are fighting against ourselves but I want to remind you that you are God's best! Facades are the working of the enemy to cloud your mind and your vision of self.  We all question our existence, our purpose, our failures and we even feel like we are at odds with God. It's okay to question -- introspection is good for your growth. So take time to look in the mirror of life as well as your own reflection, take the mask off and get real with where you are. If you are hurting, acknowledge it...whatever you feel, recognize it and remember: what's healthy is seeing, hearing, feeling and dealing but what derails is running, hiding, ignoring and down playing. I love you but God loves you best!

PRAYER:

Jehovah Jireh, supplier of every need, step into my heart. Expose dark places within me. Enter into my fears and cast them out. Make my failures useful for Your purpose. Cleanse even my reflection so that when I look at myself, I see the evidence of You in all Your splendor. Open my hears to Your soft whispers. Help me to stand with You and not be defensively at odds with You. I want to know You in the beauty of Holiness. Receive me into the shadows of Your wings and cast shadows of doubt and sins residue into the sea of forget fullness. In the precious name of Christ the Messiah I pray with faith, Amen