Moment by Moment

Today's scriptures:
Philippians 4:6-7 Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
Proverbs 3:5

TODAY'S WORD:  Title: Moment by Moment

January 23, 2014, I went to the hospital due to excruciating pain. Being pregnant, my concern was that of my unborn son. I tried not to be nervous or anxious so I prayed silently but once I saw blood I must admit, I freaked out.

After settling into a room the nurse checked my blood pressure which was sky high. Next she checked for the babies heartbeat, finding none. With both a sense of confusion and a remorseful look on her face she tried telling me that the equipment was a little faulty. She tried reassuring me letting me know the doctor would be in to check behind her. Upon the doctors arrival, inspection, exam and a zillion questions - many of which I don't even know if I answered; the doctor confirmed my fear, I miscarried.

Instantly, I began to wail. My Sister and sons father tried comforting me but all I could do was think about how attached I'd become with this little being growing in my womb. I thought of all I did, possibly right, but certainly I thought of what I could have done wrong to cause this devastation.

I cried for three days straight. (And I still weep, some days more than others). Blood pressure remained elevated. Head ached. Womb ached. Heart ached. Mind blown.

As I shared the news with those closes to me, they too grieved. Some prayed for me. Some sat with me in silence just holding my hand. Some held me and allowed me to cry. Others encouraged me to keep pushing. "Go back to work," they said, "being busy will take your mind off of it."

Others insisted that God knows best. They quoted scriptures and told me to lean on God. Some even encouraged me to praise and worship God in the midst of my sorrows. While others explained that I had no reason to be filled with sadness.

Today, I would like to remind everyone to live each day to the fullest. Appreciate good times as well as the not so good times. Allow yourself to go through whatever process presenting itself at the time it comes, for the word tells me that there is a time, season, and purpose for all things.

Don't rush. Don't try busying yourself. Don't suppress how you feel. Go through your process. Cry, scream, holler if necessary but equally, be vigilant to listen to the still soft voice of God and know when your grieving period has come to a conclusion. Maybe some of the pains and thoughts of what could have been will still come but depression is NOT an option.

Let the joy of the Lord be your strength. Allow God to hold you in His loving and nurturing arms because no matter who you are surrounded by or what their experiences have been, no one will know exactly where you are or how you feel at the core of your being but God. As my Pastor always says, "each trial comes to develop you not to destroy you"

Be still in times of regret, pain, sorrow and contemplation knowing, God is GOD!

May you surrender every care and concern to God.
May you be tried and proven as a faithful believer knowing, God does all things well.
May you be renewed and strengthened.
May you recovery expeditiously.
May you have a peace that surpasses all understanding.
May you come out as the victorious conqueror God already deemed you to be!
May you remain hopeful, bold, and fearless as you are being groomed for the next magnificent portion of your journey.

Remember this as well, everything is not about the enemy or punishment for some wrong - plenty of what happens in our lives (EVERYTHING),  is simply the will of God for He does truly know, care and does ALL things well. If there is ever any example of God's testing, Job is the perfect candidate to examine. God allowed everything that happened in his life simply to prove that he was a righteous man. He (Job) did NOT blame God for his loses, hurt or pain but instead he humbled himself in prayer, rebuking even his wife.

Trust God moment by moment my friend! This is NOT the end but a stepping stone to a vibrant new beginning.